just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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