I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
