I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Randomize
