I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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