awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize
