Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
Randomize
