You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Randomize
