Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Randomize
