I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Randomize
