Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
The struggles of a small town man whore
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
Randomize
