i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
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