sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I locked my keys in my car in front of planned parenthood. I'm terrified of going inside to ask to borrow a clothes hangar.
Just tell them you need to fix a mistake real quick.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
