Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
We have so much sex to catch up on
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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