I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
