You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
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