This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
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