there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Randomize
