could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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