Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Randomize
