new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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