I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Randomize
