He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Randomize