That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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