and you said cock pushups were impossible
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
where are you?
Hypothermia
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Randomize
