I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
smell my finger.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Randomize
