I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize
