At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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