Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
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