I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
where am i from again
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Randomize
