just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
We're not piercing ourselves today.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
Randomize
