This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Randomize
