Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Randomize
