Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
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