So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Randomize
