So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
Randomize
