True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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