Hey man sorry I got all grabby
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Randomize
