those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
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