I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
Randomize
