The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
