OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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