yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
