people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
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