So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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