my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
