No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
