Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
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