White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
Randomize
