But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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