she was so not down for the gang bang
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
